Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
