Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
