I have demons in me.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
