More tranny stories later!
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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