btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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