My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
