I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
My vagina is very pro this idea
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
