I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Randomize
