He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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