it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
