I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
