I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Randomize
