Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
