Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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