if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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