Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
