Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Randomize
