i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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