Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize