This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize