He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
