Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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