D3 body, D1 cock
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Randomize
