He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Randomize
