Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize