she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize
