Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize
