dude i'm inner monologue high
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
