Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
