its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
