I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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