do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
