why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Randomize