Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
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