Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Someone stole a lamp last night.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
