Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I would fuck him just for his dog
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Randomize
