New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Randomize
