My hair reeks of homosexuality.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
