how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
