It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
