Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize