i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize