She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Randomize
