You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
