i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
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