she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
