i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
