Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize