i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize