elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
