Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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