new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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