He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize